Monthly Archives: March 2015

Pay it Forward

31 Tuesday Mar 2015

Posted by in all about me, making changes

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I have been very fortunate in this life. I’ve had a good job and earned a good salary. We’ve had a good standard of living, enjoyed nice holidays, experienced many different countries and cultures.

I am now in a position to “pay it forward” as we pack up our home here in London and head to Australia.

We’d downsize anyway, now that our daughters have moved out. As we are putting our “stuff” into storage and only taking a suitcase each to Hobart, it has been a time to sort out, to let go of physical things.

Usually when you move house, you know where you are moving to, you can picture your stuff in a new space. We can’t do that. So we are being fairly ruthless, “do we really need to keep this?”

We have had our money’s worth from all our furniture, from all our possessions.

We started married life with suitcases of clothes, a stereo, some records and a couple of borrowed deck chairs. Fifteen years and two kids later we moved from a two bedroom place, into this four bedroom house. We filled a large removal lorry!

Twelve years on, we now have a five square foot storage unit, for a few bits of furniture, personal things, treasured books, ornaments, photos, journals, crockery, kitchen equipment, stuff that we don’t want to part with. It will be interesting to see what we actually miss over the next year.

Over recent months we have sorted out the small stuff and given to the charity shop where I volunteered. Now, we have furniture, electrical’s, garden equipment to get rid of. We are happy to donate it, to pass it on. We have not wanted to sell it on e-bay or gumtree.

As I re-read my journals of 1985 I’ve been reminded of people’s generosity to me, of the “friends of friends of friends” that I stayed with, whose car’s I borrowed.

It is nice that I can “pay it forward” now. A charity collected some furniture last week and were very grateful. They will sell on at a reasonable price, doing other people a good turn, whilst raising funds to support sick people and their families.

I’m usually quiet about my charity involvement, charity giving, but I’m happy to share this. For me, at this point in my life, it feels right to pass things on, to pay it forward.

Sometimes, small things make a big difference to another person, a kind word, a phone call or card in the post, a thoughtful gift. I hope our stuff can make a small difference to someone else, somewhere.

And for me, in future, I will buy less, think about what I want to purchase. I will accumulate a minimal amount of new stuff!

Roots and Wings

28 Saturday Mar 2015

Posted by in all about me, more to life, remembering / musing

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This is an adaption of my post from 29th October last year. It feels very relevant now as we finally head off on our “adult gap year”, thinking from the position of both a daughter and a mother.

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I read somewhere about motherhood being the least secure job in the world. As soon as you get the hang of something, such as bottle feeding, it becomes obsolete and you move on to the next phase. As soon as you establish a family routine, the kids have newfound independence and opinions. But this, of course, is the point of it all – preparing your children to leave you.

The best thing about being a parent is when you see that your child is going to surpass you, that their curiosity will take them to places and teach them things that you never even thought about.

Being a parent of adult children is another phase. Your family grows through your children, you have new people to love. As couples and new family units, your children make their own decisions. We have to respect their choices, we encouraged them to see the world, to spread their wings, so we have to accept where they choose to settle and live their lives.

Roots and Wings

Roots and Wings

“There are only two lasting bequests we can hope to give our children.
One is roots and the other is wings.”

If I had two wishes, I know what they would be

I’d wish for Roots to cling to and Wings to set me free; 



Roots of inner values, like rings within a tree,

And Wings of independence to seek my destiny.



Roots to hold forever to keep me safe and strong,

To let me know you love me, when I’ve done something wrong;



To show me by example, and help me learn to choose,

To take those actions every day to win instead of lose.



Just be there when I need you, to tell me it’s all right,

To face my fear of falling when I test my wing in flight; 



Don’t make my life too easy, it’s better if I try,

And fall and get back up myself, so I can learn to fly.



If I had two wishes and two were all I had,

And they could just be granted.


I wouldn’t ask for money or any store-bought things,

The greatest gifts I’d ask for are simple Roots and Wings

Back in 1985 – NZ beach walks and a volcano

23 Monday Mar 2015

Posted by in all about me, back in 1985, remembering / musing

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On this day in 1985 I walked for hours along the beach from Paekakariki to Paraparaumu, on the west coast of NZ North Island. As I walked the tide went out, revealing a wide beach of dark sand and shells.

I got talking to an elderly man as we both walked along, paddling. I learnt about the bird sanctuary on Kapiti Island in the distance, about Maori words, culture and ecology of NZ. He was a fascinating companion for part of my 10 km walk.

As you can see, I was still in NZ. I had postponed my flight back to Australia. I stayed with my new friends in Auckland as I sorted out logistics of staying in NZ. I then stayed with friends of theirs, in Wellington where I found work as a nanny.

Looking back, knowing the bureaucracy involved today and the qualifications required to work with children, I am amazed that I found work so easily. I guess as a twenty something English girl, with driving licence and six months experience of work in a residential children’s home, I was deemed responsible and capable for such a position. Most of the jobs I had involved sole charge of kids while their parents went away on business or specific family commitments. I wonder now where I got the confidence from.

My first family consisted of four year old Andrew, who met me in a Batman outfit, eight year old Catherine and ten year old Simon. I had seven days doing the school run, sports clubs and music lessons, cooking meals and generally taking care of a house and family. We played games, went to the local park, went swimming. I dealt with a sick kid and ear infection.

I wrote … “Bank work is nothing compared with responsibility of looking after children”. But I’d enjoyed the week and happily signed up for the next job, starting in a few days time. Hence this mini break walking along the beach on my own.

In the days following, I visited Wanganui and New Plymouth, both were interesting towns, with old buildings, botanical gardens, monuments, hill look outs with views of the coast, a volcano and surrounding landscapes.

I stayed in a quiet little youth hostel on the Wanganui River, a couple of miles out of the city of Wanganui but with the river literally at the end of the garden and a few minutes walk from the sea and another black sand beach. It was a beautiful place to watch the sun set over the sea.

The journey to New Plymouth gave superb views of Mount Egmont (since renamed to its Maori title of Mount Taranaki). It rises 2,500 metres above flat rolling countryside and is one of the worlds most symmetrical volcanic cones. At times it looked ethereal, with the volcano hovering above cloud at ground level.

So back to Wellington for my next nanny job.

Paekakariki beach

Paekakariki beach

Mount Taranaki

Mount Taranaki

100 words – house frustrations

18 Wednesday Mar 2015

Posted by in 100 word challenge, all about me, more to life

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They say that buying / selling a house is one of the most stressful things we do in life. I can vouch for that and we are only selling.

The stressful elements include …..

~ Keeping tidy for house viewings.

~ Buyers who pull out.

~ Estate Agents who give you the big sell but not the reality.

Right now, we are chasing our solicitor, our buyer is chasing their solicitor, the estate agent is chasing everyone.

I would like to get the two solicitors in the same room and bang their heads together.

It’s an ongoing frustrating waiting game.

Weekly Photo Challenge – wall

15 Sunday Mar 2015

Posted by in creativity, photography, weekly photo challenge

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This week’s prompt is … wall.

The mural of the street where I currently live, depicted through the four seasons.

wall 1

A wall in Whitehall, London.

wall 2

Part of the Australian War Memorial, London.

wall 8

Glass walls at The View from The Shard, London.

wall 6

The wall of The Old Bailey, London.

wall 5

A wall in an art gallery.

wall 7

A Tudor house, half timber frame with white painted “wattle and daub” walls.

wall 4

Reflections on a wall.

wall 11

Wall

100 word challenge – the scent

12 Thursday Mar 2015

Posted by in 100 word challenge, remembering / musing

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100 word challenge – this week’s prompt is …the scent was overpowering…

100words

The two dogs weren’t related. They had different colouring, different personalities.

Oska barked at people and would play in any water he came across. Izak barked at other animals and avoided water, stepped around puddles.

Their local walk was through a park, into woods and out via a country lane.

There were horse riders down the lane. Oska took his opportunity to roll in horse manure, knowing it would result in a telling off and a cold hose down when they got back home. The scent was overpowering but Oska thought the shampoo smell afterwards was worse.

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Join this challenge at
https://jfb57.wordpress.com/2015/03/10/100-word-challenge-for-grown-ups-week170/

“it’s cold”
all clean now
“I’ll stay here, I don’t need a wash”
This life is exhausting!